SMB4 Arkham Batman Conversations
by XMinerCobra
Summary: What if Arkhamverse Batman was put in the fourth Smash? These are his conversations with Alfred, Oracle, and Robin against his odd and interesting opponents. All characters including DLC present.
1. Before Story and Batman Moves

Batman Smash Bros. Stage Conversations

* * *

 **Hello readers, if you do not know, I wish, I reeeeeaaally wish for Arkham Batman to be in Smash Bros. I know that Batman didn't debut in a game but ARKHAM Batman didn't, an incarnation so it must count. I realized that Arkham Batman for Smash is likely one of the most realized fighters out of everyone, especially since the Arkham incarnation appeared in a sidescroller which was Arkham Origins, Blackgate- the possibilities are endless!**

 **I...haven't thought of everything but the possibilities are endless!**

 **This is if Arkham Batman was a third party character. He would have his own stage, which is Arkham Asylum, obviously. If you do his taunts here like Pit on Palutena's Temple, you can activate a call between either Time Drake Robin, Oracle or Alfred. I'll describe all of Batman's moves...I mean...ALL of them but I can't describe the Arkham Asylum stage, but you ride of the Batwing.**

 **I'll be using the Smash Bros 4 roster for this one, including the DLC characters. I miss Wolf, Snake, and the Ice Climbers. I really do miss them, hope they can make it back in next Smash.**

 **(With Nepgear, Simon Belmont, and Marie Rose as guest stars)**

 **Anyway, I'll describe the moves of Batman now, different from my usual writing format.**

 **I can't say STORY IS NOW because this basically isn't a story, right?**

* * *

Neutral Attack: Punches twice quickly, then twists then punches enemy, then elbows. He can do an infinite attack where he punches repeatedly as if he is punching an enemy is stun like in the Arkham games.

Side Tilt: Does a wide horizontal kick.

Up Tilt: Shoots Remote Electrical Charge.

Down Tilt: Slides on floor, doing damage and covering some distance.

Dash Attack: Jumps and uses one leg to kick in midair.

Side Smash: Punches with open palm.

Up Smash: Throws a sonic batarang upwards.

Down Smash: Uses Electric Gloves on the floor which was stun nearby fighters.

Neutral Aerial: Back flips his entire body as a kick in midair.

Forward Aerial: Tries to punch downwards in short range, which meteor smashes if hit.

Back Aerial: Uses batclaw backwards, hits opponents in a decent distance

Down Aerial: Causes an animation of him to dive to down quickly, if he lands on the ground, it causes damage in both sides.

Grab: Uses batclaw to grab enemies from a distance, can grab ledges with it.

Pummel: Begins punching enemy in the face.

Forward Throw: Tosses opponent forward like his combo special which tosses opponents at others.

Back Throw: Swings opponent around for a bit then tosses behind him like his combo special.

Up Throw: Tosses opponent in the air and uses Remote Electrical Charge at them.

Down Throw: Performs his Ground Takedown at the opponent which causes damage.

Standard Special: Quickfire Batarangs

Batman tosses three batarangs in quick succession at the opponent, causing light damage.

Side Special: Freeze Blast

Batman tosses a Freeze Blast in a distance, which causes a frozen state upon instant contact.

Up Special: Bat Glide

Batman jumps high into the air and spreads his cape over, then can use the ability to glide.

Down Special: Smoke Bomb

Causes Batman to take out his character-specific item, which is a Smoke Bomb, causes a white cloud of smoke to surround Batman who can either keep the modified Smoke Ball or throw it at his opponent.

Final Smash: Batmobile

Batman throws a Smoke Bomb on the enemy, trapping them to Gotham where he uses the Batmobile's tank mode, shooting various projectiles at them before finishing them off by running them over.

Causes Batman to uses a Smoke Bomb where then the opponents caught within it is attacked by the Batmobile's tank mode

Down Taunt: Causes Batman to cover his body and partial his face with his cape, as if it were a shadow.

Up Taunt: His gauntlets electrify themselves, giving the image of Arkham City: Armored Edition.

Side Taunt: Causes him to strike his famous midair pose from The Dark Knight Returns.

Smash Taunt: Presses earpiece on the Arkham Asylum stage to call one of his allies.


	2. Mario

Mario

* * *

 **Here's the first conversation. Hope you enjoy.**

 **I don't have anything else to say. This is it for the AN. Doing this just before I head to a more serious work. Just...read it in their voices, okay?**

 **STORY IS NOW.**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: Oracle. Do you copy?

Oracle: Loud and clear, Batman. Who are you fighting up against?

Batman: This man, he looks harmless but something is telling me that there is more than it seems with him.

Oracle: That's Mario, a plumber who saved Princess Peach and the Mushroom Kingdom several times from danger, according to the databases. He has gained many connections through his life, including his brother, Luigi.

Batman: Yes, but does he have an unnatural abilities of sort? The Batcomputer is reading dangerously high temperature coming from his hands.

Oracle: Yes. Usually he uses supplements of sorts to get abilities, including shooting fire from his palms. However in here, he can use that ability without the need for the supplement.

Batman: That seems rather dangerous, how is he even doing so without burning himself. Not even Firefly has developed the technology or technique to emulate pyrokinesis...interesting.

Oracle: Mario has a variety of skills at his disposal, many that can counterattack your own arsenal. I suggest you use the Freeze Blast from a distance, then grab Mario when he's vulnerable, give him any chance and you'll regret it, Bruce.

Batman: Thank you Oracle, perhaps I should research more into plumbing in case if Mario and I were to duel again after this match, when I get back to the Batcave.

Oracle: I cannot get if that's a joke, or you're being serious.

Batman: ...

Oracle: Okay, I'll just leave the call at that.

*ends call*

* * *

 **SO...WHAT DO YOU THINK?**

 **All capitals makes me tell where the AN is, just in case. This first conversation was prematurely written and it took awhile to make witty dialogue for such a grim character like Brucie. Hope I get recommended on TV Tropes for this.**

 **I know their short, but do you want conversations whilst fighting to last forever? I mean...Batman's inner monologue can get to you.**

 ***all of the cat jokes PTSD***

 **STAY TUNED!**


	3. Luigi

Luigi

* * *

 **I just realized how long it was since I wrote, me being lazy and all of that. If I just...stop writing without saying goodbye, then I forgot my account, died, or is kidnapped by child slavers.**

 **I do not like the latter two.**

 **I'll do this and this fic will go character by order in the roster, starting from Mario. You'll have to wait for a bit for your main to show up. The cover image is a picture of Tsumugu from an underrated anime known as Nagi no Asukara (watch it). Sorry I couldn't get better definition.**

 **I have existence issues currently, likely a factor why can't I write.**

 **Also review, fave, fallow if you like this fic. Otherwise I talk to myself and say how good I am at life by myself.**

 **STORY IS NOW.**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: Alfred, there is a fighter who has a similar build to Mario over here.

Alfred: Sir, I believe that is Luigi, Mario's younger brother. Despite saving the kingdom and his brother himself, he apparently lacks esteem for his own abilities. Quite sad, actually.

Batman: No time to pity my own enemy. What should be watching out for?

Alfred: His Up Special is rather dangerous up close, if Luigi is too close to you once he preforms it, it shall send you upwards, Master Bruce. It isa rather painful experiment you do not wish to dwell on.

Batman: Anything else?

Alfred: I do, he or some version of him has written a rather intriguing series of books, many focusing on his psychology of being in the shadow of his brother. I have given Master Grayson a copy of one, shall I give you one also once you return?

Batman: Thank you, but I am a bit busy right now.

Alfred: Oh, I see. Be also weary of his Luigi Cyclone, he may easily trap you within it. I recommend you use the Batclaw before it happens.

Batman: For such a fearful man, Luigi has enough ego to name his own moves after himself.

Alfred: Um...sir...I believe many of your tools are named after your 'nightly' persona? The Batarang, the Batmobile, the Batcomputer?

Batman: I am aware.

Alfred: Isn't that a bit...hypocritical, Master Bruce?

Batman: Give that book when I get home.

Alfred: Of course.

*call ends*

* * *

 **I'LL JUST WRITE WHO'S GONNA BE THERE WHEN I GET TO ROBIN.**

 **Trust me, when I get to Fire Emblem Robin, it's gonna be hilarious but it will take awhile since I have to get ideas for the next conversation, hope I get to put some mythology gags in here.**

 **Review, fave, follow if you like, please!**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	4. Peach

Peach

* * *

 **Here it is, we fight a lady! Woooooo! Now I must wallow in existence as I realize there are many abused women that are being abused as I type.**

 **That was a mood whiplash.**

 **Hope I get down Batman's personality well and show it more, he's not just seriousness. Hope I could put mythology gags also.**

 **I saw the Ben 10 reboot trailer gave me cancer, it hurts so much to see this...Johnny Test animation and character designs. Oh gawd.**

 **Review, fav, follow if you like this, thank you!**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: Tim, it seems like I'm fighting woman dressed as a princess. Is this an escaped Arkham inmate?

Robin: No, Bruce. This is Princess Peach, the royalty of the Mushroom Kingdom. I wonder how someone like her got to be here.

Batman: Tim.

Robin: Err, oh right. She uses various unorthodox weaponry, such as pans, an umbrella, even her own servants called Toads, like toadstools.

Batman: Her own servant? That sounds like Quinn or even Joker mentality.

Robin: Don't worry, the Toad isn't harmed but that's the most dangerous part. If Princess Peach takes him out, hitting the toad will release some sort of spores that will damage you and the Batsuit.

Batman: Poison Ivy would love to have a shield like that. How do I counter it, Tim?

Robin: Either grab her when your close, or shoot her from afar. If she relief on the move too much, you can easily punish her. The Smoke Bomb might also help masquerading your moves as you attack.

Batman: Thanks Tim, but oddly enough, this woman does remind me of Harley, a bit too much for my comfort. Except maybe this time she's actually not faking the innocence.

Robin: Just don't send her to Arkham, Bruce. Her kingdom would get angry if their ruler is found to be in a mental asylum.

Batman: Yes, we already a god there. We don't want two plumbers coming in an breaking everyone out either.

*call ends*

* * *

 **HOPE I MADE ROBIN WELL.**

 **We didn't see much of Tim Drake Robin in the Arkham games, so I'm doing my best here. I get a feeling I'm drawing to many comparisons from Batman to Snake. Even the voice that talks in my head is Batman.**

 **My school hurts my head.**

 **Review, fav, or follow if you like these because my mentality needs the help.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	5. Bowser

Bowser

* * *

 **Here it is, King Koopa himself. I wondered who was the most powerful Nintendo villain, the only one I know is Tabuu or Zanza.**

 **I need DC on Netflix, I need a continuation of Beware the Batman because I heard Young Justice is coming back. I NEED not-Teen Titans Go to exist! Pleeeeeaaaase, Netflix, you're the best form of legal entertainment of this generation.**

 **I'm doing this in character roster order, just to remind you.**

 **I don't own anything.**

 **STORY IS NOW.**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: Oracle, seems like sightings of Killer Croc were rumors, instead it was this turtle. I can't tell if that's better or worse.

Oracle: That's Bowser, king of the Koopas, though more specifically several species fall under his rule. He tries to kidnap Princess Peach and take over the Mushroom Kingdom every so often but Mario and/or Luigi comes and stops him each time.

Batman: He sounds dangerous, Oracle, give me his physical attributes.

Oracle: Bowser's quite strong, having enough strength to rival Killer Croc's and is relatively very fast despite his size. He has thick claws and can shoot fire breathe out of his mouth. You can see his shell is spiked and it CAN be weaponized. I don't like this, should we get Dick or Tim?

Batman: No need, it seems like what he lacks is range along with his massive body mass is made up with strength and mobility. I should wear him out with the Batarangs and the Freeze Blasts, then once he's worn out, I'll go in for the kill.

Oracle: Good idea, I'll run more research on the turtle. He might be even more powerful than some of the foes you faced, so watch out.

Batman: Don't worry Barbara, I could handle this.

*call ends*

* * *

 **FINALLY DONE.**

 **I didn't know what gag to use so I made one with references to Killer Croc, next one will be Yoshi...I think.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	6. Yoshi

Yoshi

* * *

 **I get a special surprise for you this chapter, I know it is a bit early for surprise guest on the conversation. Nobody loves me, that's why nobody shows up in my life. Likely because I'm making children watch Salad Fingers.**

 **;-;**

 **Wait. Game2002 reviewed me? ME? Holy crap! I am now inspired!**

 **I NEED A PS4 MOTHERFUCKER. THERE IS GAME OF THE YEAR WITCHER 3 AND ARKHAM KNIGHT AND UNCHARTED.**

 **Also, SERIES 9 OF DOCTOR WHO IS ON NETFLIX, HOLY FUCK. BINGE TIME.**

 **STORY IS NOW.**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: Robin, give me information on this reptilian creature. Robin?

Riddler: GUESS WHO?

Batman: Nygma. How did you get on this line?

Riddler: Well, I am flattered that you are asking me the question. Riddle me this, what is long, pinkish and always with you (most of the time)?

Batman: A tongue.

Riddler: Yes, seems like Yoshi's tongue is an...interesting body part. It is elastic in nature and can grab you easily. If you're asking how I know this, it's because I actually spent time researching on your opponents once I heard you were fighting in this brutish tournament. Seems like I bested you in the intellectual apartment yet again, Dark Knight.

Batman: Well then, can you tell me what to watch out for if you're so intelligent?

Riddler: Ah yes. What is both alive but dead but at the same time not either that you can eat? I won't wait for an answer, the answer is...an egg. Once Yoshi eats you, he'll lay you like the undeveloped fetus you are and into a shell.

Batman: 'He'? The female lays eggs, Nygma.

Riddler: That's not the point! Now that you know the dinosaur's fearsome abilities, are you cowering in the corner, Batman? Are you terrified what an innocent looking monster can do to you?

Batman: No, I feel grateful that you were to tell me about my opponent's strengths. Now I know what to watch out for, thanks for the advice, Nygma.

Riddler: WAIT, WHAT?! BATMAN, IF YOU DISCONNECT THIS CALL-

*call ends*

* * *

 **Well. Riddler. That's all I got. He invaded Middle-earth once, had to be stopped with our favorite passive aggressive robot from Portal. Rode a Balrog. No, really. It happened.**

 **My existence is meaningless. I am a speck of a large universe that I will be forgotten, like a booger you leave on the door but you forget it and when you grab the doorknob you feel it come back.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	7. Rosalina & Luma

Rosalina & Luma

* * *

 **I'm actually quite sad that Ice Climbers didn't make it to this Smash. If you didn't know, the reason why is that the AI of them didn't work in the 3DS version, since they wanted all characters in both versions, they were scrapped instead. Pretty sure they would be S-tier if Diddy Kong didn't beat them. It is odd that Luma worked perfectly. Shame because I like playing as Ice Climbers.**

 **Please make them come back for next Smash, Daddy Sakurai.**

 **I think everyone in the Smash fanfic community knows who Game2002 is, with that golden screaming Ganondorf icon. Don't know why he's screaming, did he see some Boku no Pico, only Ganondorf could scream at that.**

 **STORY IS NOW.**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: Robin, analyze the current opponent I'm facing.

Robin: Oh. Um...this excessively tall woman has a partner of sorts that is some...star creature? She also has a rod of sorts which controls the star.

Batman: Correct. Apparently her creature could separate from her independently and fight alongside her at whatever direction. I should watch out for that. Now, analyze any weaknesses, Tim.

Robin: Her figure is very tall, so you could target her easily. Apparently the independence of the creature is not very reliable but it can be beaten up easily. I kinda feel a bit bad for it.

Batman: Why do you feel bad for it, Tim?

Robin: I don't know, feels like this thing isn't appreciated enough. Has to help fight half of the battles but doesn't get enough credit. He's like...

Batman: A partner?

Robin: No, a sidekick is what I'm meant to say. Just try and take out the Luma or whatever before the fighter gets the upper hand.

Batman: Yes, hone your analyzation skills harder while I'm gone. Got it, Tim?"

Robin: Sure...(I'm a freaking Luma).

Batman: What was that?"

Robin: N-Nothing."

*ends call*

* * *

 **THAT'S IT.**

 **I wanted to make a quick talk on how Luma is a sidekick that can be kicked like shit. Gotta kill mosquitos right now.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	8. Bowser Jr

Bowser Jr.

* * *

 **OH DEAR, THE MIDGET WHO KILLED EVERYONE IN HIS REVEAL TRAILER. Kinda shocking how easily Bowser Jr. killed everyone in the trailer, makes me shudder what he could do in Subspace Emissary.**

 **Anyway, Game2002 wonders what Batman's entrance will be, it'll be him gliding down onto the stage while the swarm of bats around him scatter. Not the Batwing because the Arkham Asylum stage will already have the Batwing in it already, plus where would the Batwing fly to once it drops Batman down? Might crash into a mountain suddenly.**

 **Don't know why Bowser Jr.'s very low on tier list, he's OP.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

Alfred: It seems like you are facing Prince Bowser the Second of the Koopa Clan, Master Bruce.

Batman: I need to know what's in that child's vehicle, Alfred. The Batcomputer is sensing many mechanical objects within it.

Alfred: Oh yes, let me see...oh dear. It seems like there are even more things hiding within and more functions than your utility belt, sir.

Batman: Such as?

Alfred: The vehicle, known as the Clown Car has built in wheels for quick mobility, mechanical boxing gloves, saws...a large fork? There is also an odd amount of weaponry that would have appealed to the Joker, such as a mobile bomb in the appearance of toys, a weaponized actual tongue, drills?

Batman: How much does that vehicle carry? This is getting ridiculous.

Alfred: That's not all, there are two heavyweight balls, and there is...oh are you blood serious? Somehow an entire cannon with a loaded cannonball is also there, replacing said weaponized tongue.

Batman: What kind of technology inhabits that vehicle? When I'm done with this fight, I'll attempt to confiscate the car and reverse engineer it.

Alfred: Frankly, I'm rather afraid of how many objects you could stuff into such a compact vehicle. I fear more on what you may our within it.

Batman: I actually have a few ideas.

Alfred: Well, the excuse me as I resume washing the dishes, Master Bruce.

Batman: _Certainly._

* * *

 **Huh. Alfred didn't talk about how Batman has shark repellent.**

 **I'm intrigued by the Playstation VR, especially how well realistic Batman VR is but if there were only more games, or more games compatible for it like how terrifying Outlast would be in VR.**

 **STAY TUNED.**


	9. Wario

Wario

* * *

 **The farting biker. I always put Wario in his iconic first outfit, nearly all the time just to fit. Dunno where his biker outfit came from, let me know, I know it was from a WarioWare game but which one?**

 **There is also a...fourth party (?) character that I actually believe would show up in Smash, which is Spongebob, with his games and having a near endless possibilities for a moveset. Hope I actually make one because all the Leedle, Leedle, Leedle, Lees. I actually waited for Spongebob in Game2002's fics, if I remember right.**

 **Dio from JoJo for Smash also, just saying.**

 **STORY IS NOW.**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: Oracle, I believe my opponent has some sort of poison. The smell around is being read as toxic.

Oracle: Those aren't poisonous gas, those are farts, Bruce.

Batman: Farts? It's not a time to joke around, Barbara.

Oracle: No, really. The longer Wario doesn't use his fart move, the more powerful it could and has a high possibility to damaging the Batsuit. I actually think Dick would enjoy you fighting a farting biker.

Batman: Just tell me how to beat this man. At this rate, Joker's Laughing Gas is less lethal in comparison.

Oracle: Alright, Wario can extend the width and height of his own jaw and chomp on you if you're too close. He also has a motorbike he can quickly attempt to run you over with.

Batman: Please, tell me there isn't anything else. This smell is killing me enough.

Oracle: Just hold your breath.

Batman: How-

Oracle: Hold. Your. Breath.

Batman: Okay.

*ends call*

* * *

 **THIS TOOK AWHILE.**

 **Wondered how Batman would react if he smelled a fart, since he likely has a bat-nose. They can smell well as much as they breath...I think. The sheer ridiculous nature of Wario is a good contrast to Batman's seriousness.**

 **Also, spoiler and reminder for the Lucas chapter, Batman will scream about 'darkness' and 'no parents'.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	10. Donkey Kong

Donkey Kong

* * *

 **I'm listening to the Ken Stage song from Smash, it's amazing. Oh mah gawd.**

 **Hope I can make a Harambe joke. Our saint of the internet. Died for our sins.**

 **I'll just change the 'no parents' joke for Lucas to 'no parent'.**

 **STORY IS NOW**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: Is that...an ape?

Alfred: I'm afraid so, Master Bruce. Hopefully by the end of this, some environmentalist will bring this gorilla back to the wild. Be warned, that Donkey Kong is highly intelligent animal, with strength rivaling of Killer Croc.

Batman: Why is the 'donkey' within his name? It isn't like he has any relation to them.

Alfred: Good thing, because if he can ram you...I shudder at the thought.

Batman: Just tell me what to do, I am not having a conversation about the names of gorillas today.

Alfred: Well, Donkey Kong can pound the floor with his open palms, creating shockwaves through it, I recommend you get at bay from him and use the Batarangs or go aerial.

Batman: Thank you, Alfred. What's next? A gorilla with the brain of an alien?

Alfred: Please don't jinx our lives, Master Bruce. Once you say words like that, Murphy's law shall take effect.

Batman: Sure Alfred, like that could actually happen.

*ends call*

* * *

 **...and it did. Likely post-Arkham Knight if you're not familiar with The Flash's rogues. Hope you guys watch the show, I haven't yet since it's hard to keep a schedule in the Philippines when it involves TV. Got this thing called education, which will mess up your schedule, especially if I could actually remember anything.**

 **Maybe I'll take literature course in college, dunno.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	11. Diddy Kong

Diddy Kong

* * *

 **The top tier character is here to wreck everyone. Or at least that's what the list says. I never got the hang of using Diddy Kong, Smash is a game that requires timing and precision, I frankly lack both.**

 **I shall enter the Steel Ball Run, to win at Smash and at life in general. Get me my horse.**

 **Please review, if you like this...fic thing.**

 **STORY IS NOW.**

* * *

*starts call*

Robin: Bruce, be careful out there!

Batman: Tim, calm yourself. What's wrong?

Robin: You are facing the most dangerous foe in this Smash tournament. He is more powerful than Joker, Killer Croc, and Poison Ivy fused together.

Batman: It's a monkey.

Robin: Yes, the combos he could do to you are devastating. He has banana peel that will leave you vulnerable, a gun that can explode right on your face, a kick with force not even you could pull.

Batman: And that is dangerous because...?

Robin: Look, Diddy Kong has the potential to beat all inmates of Arkham, maybe everyone in Gotham.

Batman: Tim, it's just a monkey.

Robin: O-Okay, just...be extra careful around him, alright Bruce?

Batman: Sure, maybe you should retire for the night.

Robin: I am perfectly well, Bruce. Just a bit sleepy, is all.

Batman: I hope Scarecrow didn't come back from the dead and sprayed you with Feat Toxin. That will be a problem...

Robin: I AM NOT CRAZY.

Batman: Didn't say you were.

*ends call*

* * *

 **Weird Robin panicking about a monkey, most top players of Smash woulda done it too.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	12. Mr Game & Watch

Mr. Game & Watch

* * *

I **do not know how the heck did Mr. Game & Watch's own psychical body managed to create a million clones of itself. With R.O.B. being evil for a bit in Subspace while Nintendo's oldest mascot being a central point of producing an army who which to take over potentially the multiverse, this would be some weird marketing campaign.**

 **This is what happens if you don't look back at nostalgia! Making an entire army come busting down your door if you don't thanks to a giant blue man in space.**

 **Waiting for Film Theory to do a Madoka Magica theory.**

 **I forgot to say, this fic is set before Arkham Knight, just to clear that up. The Scarecrow joke is very reasonable.**

 **STORY IS NOW.**

* * *

*starts call*

Oracle: The Batcomputer is getting weird radiation readings from this fighter. More powerful than anything Ace Chemicals can produce actually.

Batman: This man is two dimensional! His body is entirely flat like paper, this is strange.

Oracle: Apparently from what I can gather, his body was once used to produce an army made of his own DNA unwillingly. The readings off him are incredible, almost nothing I've ever seen!

Batman: So...a two dimensional man who flips burgers, holds a bucket, and uses a pump to fight made an entire army that threatened all of reality.

Oracle: You wish you were there, weren't you?

Batman: The Batmobile would have made the entire incident go away more quickly, especially if the new tank upgrades were built into it by then.

Oracle: They blew up the Halberd-

Batman: The Batwing could have taken care of all of them, they should have called me.

Oracle: ...okay. Maybe after you're done with this match, let's see who gets overwhelmed, alright?

Batman: You wish.

*ends call*

* * *

 **It's funny whenever Batman goes in his ego. It's better if his friends prove him wrong and he's just like 'shut up'.**

 **I'm loving Street Fight IV right now. Just got it and it's good, reaaaally good, I might not be good at it or too late for it but I'm getting there.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	13. Little Mac

Little Mac

* * *

 **When I first played Brawl, I wondered by Little Mac was reduced only to an assist in the game, even if he could a full fledged fighter. I knew he would be a fighter in the next one and look where we are now.**

 **Also my cousin keeps using Little Mac every time we play, thinking the power meter kills all. Bet he doesn't know about Lucario's secret aura damage heightener or Cloud's limit breaks.**

 **Addicted to the Roundabout, help.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Alfred: It's a boxer, Master Bruce, a rather petite one at that. Remember when I trained you to box before you went to learn martial arts with monks?

Batman: Yes, Little Mac is a famous boxer, I have seen his matches on television before.

Alfred: You? Watching sports of the telly? I thought you never had the spare time.

Batman: I have my own hobbies besides being a billionaire and a vigilante. Little Mac's obvious weakness is that he attacks on the ground than the air and doesn't have a range attack. I should keep him into the air and attack from a distance.

Alfred: I remember when you had tried to uppercut for the first time against a suit of armor. I still have a picture.

Batman: Alfred...

Alfred: I'll call Master Tim and show him. Master Tim?

Robin: Yeah, Alfred? Is it Two-Face? Ivy? Scareface?

Alfred: No, wish for me to send pictures of young Master Bruce attempting the box a knight's armor?

Robin: Gladly-

*gets kicked out*

Batman: Some memories are left forgotten, Alfred. Do remember that.

*ends call*

* * *

 **Hmm. I got this idea after watching Gotham and Alfred keeps talking Bruce down every time he tries to be 'stronger'. Cracks me up every time Alfred tells Bruce to 'get his bloody arse down here'.**

 **For the Arkham time placement confusion, Scarecrow is considered dead to mostly everyone, this is before Arkham Knight, the Batmobile just got the tank upgrades, Joker has been cremated.**

 **Done, okay?**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	14. Link

Link

* * *

 **If Snake showed up, they'll fight for Mr. Utility belt title. No Joker will show up since...he's dead. Won't spoil more who haven't finished Arkham City, which will come with Arkham Asylum on next generation consoles as Batman: Return to Arkham in HIGH DEFINITION.**

 **Hope Snake comes back in next Smash, really do.**

 **Hope Lana from Hyrule Warriors also makes it somehow. She was a great character even though I haven't played Hyrule Warriors.**

 **After this, might make either a Is the Order a Rabbit? plus JoJo crossover or a Fire Emblem Fates plus Skyrim crossover.**

 **Also I left for Singapore, might explain the lateness of this chapter or the next, if I didn't post anything, my plane blew up.**

 **My STAND, is ALASKAN BULL WORM.**

 **STORY IS NOW.**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: The Batcomputer is detecting various weaponry on this opponent's body. Oracle, give me information about him.

Oracle: Well, this is Link, the hero of Hyrule. His sword is a Master Sword, supposedly an ancient weapon that slays all known evil.

Batman: That's what the last person with a sword I met described his blade before I sent him to Arkham. What else?

Oracle: Well, he has a shield, obviously made to block projectiles. He has a Clawshot used to grab from a distance, bombs to throw, a bow and a quiver of arrows, and a boomerang.

Batman: A boomerang?

Oracle: You have Batarangs, he has a boomerang, you're even in the utility apartment.

Batman: Utility apartment?

Oracle: Link has items that help him in his fight, you have a belt that somehow contains shark-repellent. Don't know how you or Link are able to keep all those things, or even keep track of them.

Batman: You are never too prepared, Barbara.

Oracle: Even for a shark attack?

Batman: Arkham City was a dangerous place.

Oracle: Then where's the Ultra Batclaw then? That thing was too useful just to put away, I don't even know where it went.

Batman: ...

Oracle: ...

Batman: Shark-repellent is more useful than you actually think.

*ends call*

* * *

 **Deadpanning Batman is best Batman.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	15. Zelda

Zelda

* * *

 **I just realized the Phantom Zelda can summon is a Stand from JoJo.**

 **I've got a JoJo phase right now. It's the most fabulous stage of someone's life. Happy Halloweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeen...hopefully.**

 **Mister Mosbey for Smash. Hope you guys know who he is.**

 **My IPad doesn't want to freaking work with the internet anymore, so the delays will be longer.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Alfed: My word, an actual magic user. Never thought I would see one with my age.

Batman: It's just some sort pyrotechnics, don't be too impressed Alfred.

Alfred: Master Bruce, pardon me for stating the obvious but that magic does not look like anything that could be produced by any technology.

Batman: Magic is just an illusion. A myth created by the League of Assassins to terrify the populace.

Alfred: That paranoia has really got to you, Master Bruce?

Batman: There is no possible way such a thing like magic exists.

Alfred: Even the giant suit of moving armor isn't real?

Batman: Hallucinogenic drugs planted into the air.

Alfred: So...even Ms. Zatanna is a fraud?

Batman: I'm getting out of this call.

*ends call*

* * *

 **Dunno what happened to my IPad, I know it doesn't like working with the internet but not this bad.**

 **My mind hurts enough already, why IPad, WHY?!**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	16. Sheik

Sheik

* * *

 **At first, I felt bothered that two alternates are separated but then I accepted it very well afterward. A bit...too well to the point when I look back at Brawl, I couldn't do combat besides Subspace Emissary.**

 **Also for you guys wondering why Batman denies magic here, he believes in chemical structure, such as how the Lazarus Pit only renews cells, hence why he doesn't call the Lazarus Pit magic and believes the Fear Toxin and the 'trial' potion's affect on the physical body are very strong hallucinogens also.**

 **GOT INTERNET BACK.**

 **STORY IS NOW.**

* * *

*starts call*

Robin: Is that a League of Assassins member? Oh wait, it's just Zelda.

Batman: Zelda? No, it's a man known as Sheik, a member of the Sheikah Tribe.

Robin: No, that's a woman.

Batman: The Detective Mode is reading her skeleton classified as man, so your argument is nullified.

Robin: Okay, Bruce, I know you like your big words and all but Zelda used magic to change herself into-

Batman: Oh dear, not the magic again.

Robin: Let me put it simply, that is a disguise. Geez, why are you so worked up over of Sheik is a man or a woman right now.

Batman: If Detective Mode is confused on his gender then there are modifications I must fix back at the Batcave.

Robin: It's ma-

Batman: It's. Not. Magic.

*ends call*

* * *

 **The denial of magic is odd, considering Solomon Grundy showed up out of electricity and swamp mud. Batman likely explains it through...SCIENCE.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	17. Ganondorf

Ganondorf

* * *

 **Now that I can change from Wolf to human at will, I'm extremely enjoying Twilight Princess now more than ever.**

 **My ear hurts. It really hurts. Turns out Spongebob was considered for Smash, being pressured by the fanbase by Smash 4's progression. Not included for obvious reasons.**

 **STORY IS NOW.**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: Hmm, this man looks dangerous. Oracle, send me data on my enemy-

Joker: Oh hey, Bats!

Batman: Joker!

Joker: You betcha Bats! You think some poison can stop me, who do you think I am? Your girlfriend? HA HA HA HA!

Batman: How did you get into this call? How did you even survive?

Joker: Oh dear, oh dear, Bats! That would just spoil the fun! This big guy your fighting looks tougher than a rock a bludgeoned a man to death with!

Batman: ...

Joker: Silent, are we? That Ganondorf guy isn't looking too happy. He can grab you and strangle you, oh goodness, the agony! The suffering! The screams! It's all so delightful...

Batman: Tell me right here why you are alive or I would hunt you down-

Oracle: Uh, Bruce?

Batman: ...

Oracle: You...alright?

Batman: I-I'm fine.

Oracle: It almost sounds like you were having a panic attack! You alright?

Batman: I'm fine...just...fine...

*ends call*

* * *

 **Well that was PTSD. Batman likely got a few nightmares since Arkham City, thanks to some lingering poison within him.**

 **I want Nintendo Switch, I want the new Zelda, I want a PS4 but I'm too poor at the moment. Feel bad for me, people!**

 **STAY TUNED.**


	18. Toon Link

Toon Link

* * *

 **So...I'm pretty sure the reason why Link and Toon Link didn't show up in the same cutscenes in Subspace is because the time paradox would have awakened Tabuu again.**

 **If there's another story mode, who'll the next villain be? Likely an original and an explanation for Master Form (still can't beat 8.5 difficulty).**

 **STORY IS NOW.**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: Who is this tiny person with cat eyes? He resembles Link.

Alfred: That's Toon Link, Master Bruce. A poor, young boy who's sister was kidnapped by Ganondorf. He is another version of Link-"

Batman: Another version?

Alfred: Yes, apparently there are different Links across time and alternate timelines. The Hero of Time, the Hero of Light, the Hero of the Goddess, the Hero of the Minish, the Hero of Winds, the Hero of Four Swords, the Hero of Two Worlds-

Batman: Which one is this, Link?

Alfred: The Hero of Winds, sir.

Batman: Wind? Is there a Hero of Trains?

Alfred: W-Well, excuse me, sir...

Batman: Oh my goodness. I'll just watch out a smaller and faster Link. I have Batarangs to throw.

*ends call*

* * *

 **WELL EXCUUUUUSE ME PRINCESS, SOME CHAPTERS ARE MEANT TO BE SHORT.**

 **See what I did there, with Alfred?**

 **STAY TUNED.**


	19. Samus

Samus

* * *

 **When I first was a dumb boy who played Smash with my cousin, I thought Samus was a man.**

 **Guess I was wrong.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Robin: Another person in a suit. Looks like Freeze met his match.

Batman: Just tell me what I need to know, this woman somehow knows how to curl herself up into a ball within the suit without crushing her entire body.

Robin: It does look painful, does it?

Batman: Perhaps I should analyze her suit...for reasons.

Robin: To turn into a ball?

Batman: Something like that. Her suit's range is impeccable, the plasma is somehow manipulated to take the forms of a ball and a whip.

Robin: Wish you could just stun her with your cape to make things easier, what happened to that move here?

Batman: Like the Ultra Batclaw? It is unnecessary for the battles I currently must face, I must also rely on it less.

Robin: This is not a training program! Look, Samus can plant bombs, likely fatal if weren't for that Batsuit. I think you should use the stun-

Batman: Who's the sidekick?

Robin: Me...

Batman: That's right. Now shoo along now, go stop Two-Face or Penguin.

Robin: Why can't I have my own identity, like...how about Red Robin?

Batman: Do you want to be sued? Fight Two-Face, he's the lawyer then you could call yourself that.

Robin: Ugh, okay.

*ends call*

* * *

 **Red Robin, yum!**

 **Finished Stardust Crusaders, so...beautiful.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	20. Zero Suit Samus

Zero Suit Samus

* * *

 **Wait, is there a Stand out there that makes people lay eggs?**

 **Enemy Stands are OP.**

 **Wanna get done with this fic soon, need other fics to write like a moe anime and JoJo crossover. Writing this as I watch with Is the Order a Rabbit? simultaneously so...don't blame me! I'm still in school!**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Oracle: Okay, we found this tournament's version of Catwoman. Albeit a less seductive or thieving.

Batman: But perhaps a bit more dangerous. Her arsenal, even without her armor is just as powerful and even more quick.

Oracle: Reminds of myself, you know, before Joker.

Batman: Yes, I know.

Oracle: ...

Batman: ...

Oracle: So...can you steal her suit so my wheelchair can do all the Batgirl things I did back then?

Batman: No.

Oracle: Aw.

*ends call*

* * *

 **Gotta speed with this so I could write other fics.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	21. Pit

Pit

* * *

 **Za Walludo. MUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDA!**

 **Dunno what I went with that joke. Wonder if they put in Xenoblade X in next Smash, I played it and it has lot of atheism but Palutena's there so it kinda disputes your claims of religion.**

 **Hope I don't get comments on this.**

 **STORY IS NOW.**

* * *

*starts call*

Palutena: Oh dear, seems like Pit might have a problem dealing with you.

Batman: You! How did you get into this call?

Palutena: My godly divinity can hack into any piece of technology you have, Batman. Dojya~n.

Batman: You do not have that power, Palutena. I looked into your file.

Palutena: How did you-wait, I have a file?

Batman: Got you.

Palutena: Shoot. Fell for the classic trick. Well, at least let me award you with a little information on my champion over there.

Pit: Lady Palutena! Don't give the enemy stuff on me!

Batman: How did you get to this call also?

Palutena: Don't worry, I won't tell the more private things you do, unless he wants to.

Batman: I believe I do not wish to know.

Pit: Yeah, I agree. He doesn't need to know anything!

Palutena: Pit's Guardian Orbiters deflect projectiles!

Pit: Stop, please! .

Palutena: His flight now just goes straight up like a rocket.

Pit: Viridi! Pittoo! Can you end this conversation?!

Viridi: No, I'm entertained.

Dark Pit: Don't know how I ended up here.

Pit: HELP ME. OH MY GODDESS!

Batman: I'll leave this conversation now...

*ends call*

* * *

 **I watched the Scooby-doo Project, a series of officially made shorts of the Scooby-doo gang parodying the Blair Witch Project...they died in the end and it freaked me a bit out.**

 **STAY TUNED.**


	22. Palutena

Palutena

* * *

 **Funny thing, me and my cousin accidentally paused during one of Palutena's panty peek moments and we laughed too hard.**

 **Does that mean under Rosalina's dress, there is an infinite void that can shoot miniature galaxies? I know a body's using that dress but the dress itself...**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Alfred: Ah, Miss Palutena is whom you are fighting, Master Bruce. A rather refined woman, might I say.

Palutena: Oh, don't flatter me, Alfred!

Alfred: Oh ho ho ho, I do say you deserve all the praise, Miss Palutena!

Batman: Since when did you two become good buddies?

Alfred: Just now, one can say that people are meant to be friends at first sight.

Batman: You're not even looking at each other.

Palutena: Well, since your friend here is so nice, I'll tell you some of my moves. I can reflect your projectiles back at you and counter! My staff also could lock onto you and shoot you.

Batman: Well, that was the easiest way to extract information.

Alfred: Do say, both of you of you try your best and perhaps I should invite Miss Palutena for crumpets!

Batman: Just don't invite her to...our residence.

*ends call*

* * *

 **That was quick.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	23. Marth

Marth

* * *

 **This man is too pretty to be a man! This is the end of the world!**

 **ZA WARUDO!**

 **STORY IS NOW-time moves once again.**

* * *

*starts call*

Robin: Look how beautiful he is.

Batman: Robin, don't become like this now.

Robin: His figure is so...alluring! It's glorious.

Batman: Yes, he is beautiful.

Robin: Yes, he will be mine.

Batman: That sword is really beautiful...

Robin: Yeah, it is...

Batman: ...

Robin: ...

Batman: Umm...the moveset?

Robin: Oh right, Marth's attacks will be stronger by the tip of his sword, watch out of that.

Batman: ...

Robin: ...

Batman: Is...that it?

Robin: Let me just admire things in peace, Bruce.

Batman: ...

Robin: ...

Batman: Okay...I'll just leave now.

Robin: Okay.

Batman: ...

Robin: ...

Batman: Bye.

*ends call*

* * *

 **Sorry, couldn't make a joke.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	24. Ike

Ike

* * *

 **Ike went zero to one freaking hundred by Smash 4 thanks to his buffness. Makes sense but now I feel weird when I go back to Brawl. In fact, Smash 4 made it weird to get back to Brawl entirely.**

 **Scaaaaarrrrry.**

 **STORY IS NOW.**

* * *

*starts call*

Oracle: Wow, this is odd.

Batman: Hmm?

Oracle: Apparently during Brawl, Ike had the body build of that of Marth or Link, now he has the body build of Ganondorf.

Batman: How did he get the build just in between all that time? Venom? Extreme body building?

Oracle: I think it's the latter. I don't think strength enhancing drugs are in medieval times.

Batman: Or did his body have to evolve immediately because of his humongous sword?

Oracle: Uh, Bruce. I think your ideas of how a man got buff in a timespan are becoming more insane with each idea.

Batman: I mean, look at that sword, it's huge.

Oracle: Okay, until your mind is okay, I'm exiting out of this talk.

Batman: Or perhaps an extraterrestrial virus-

*ends call*

* * *

 **Huh, two in one day. Fun.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	25. Robin

Robin

* * *

 **NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH NAHNAH NAH NAH NAH NAH, BATMAN!**

 **Too many nah nahs.**

 **Like, the Fire Emblem Nah.**

 **STORY IS NOW**

* * *

*starts call*

Oracle: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Batman: Why are you laughing, Oracle?

Robin: I could think of a few good reasons.

Batman: Oh right, I'm fighting Robin. Not you, Tim.

Oracle: This is hilarious.

Robin: This Robin is a skilled mage and swordsman, that is a huge difference-

Oracle: Yeah, birdbrain. We get it.

Robin: You didn't just call me that, Barbs.

Batman: Yes, birdbrain. Now leave this conversation, you're after Alfred.

Alfred: Excuse me sir, I heard the fighter you are facing is facing Robin. I'm wondering if Master Tim has anything to say about it?

Oracle: Oh, he has several things to say about.

Robin: Okay, BYE!

*ends call*

* * *

 **Gotta rush through to all characters, while having quality which is very hard.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	26. Duck Hunt

Duck Hunt

* * *

 **I wonder if anybody saw this guy coming if the leaks didn't happen. So, in an alternate dimension, there is a sharp shooter with a gun that can go through the TV and to the dimension to each disc to every Smash game every time we perform a shooting related attack.**

 **Meh, I'm dumb.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Alfred: Oh, a dog and a duck, and a sharp shooter!

Batman: Sharp shooter? All I see is the dog and a duck.

Alfred: The shooter is actually sniping from another area of unknown origin when needed.

Batman: A sniper! Where?

Alfred: Unfortunately, we could not detect any sort of life outside of the ring you're battling at, this sniper seems to carry rapid fire firearms of some kind.

Batman: I'll hunt this man down after this match.

Alfred: After you beat the duck and dog.

Batman: After. Hope the Detective Mode is working.

Alfred: Should we adopt a dog, Master Bruce? They are lovely companions to keep around.

Batman: Like...a Bat-Hound?

Alfred: Precisely! That title does have a ring to it, don't you say?

Batman: Hmm...what would I even name it? The dog, I mean.

Alfred: Ainsworth? Adrian? Angelo?

Batman: What's with the names starting with an 'A'?

Alfred: Oh, no reason.

*ends call*

* * *

 **I decided to publish the fic I want as I write this one also. Don't blame me for delays.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	27. Kirby

Kirby

* * *

 **Technically, Kirby is the strongest character, series wise. He's toppled gods, fought planets and was one of the people to save everyone in Brawl. Agaibst what Game Theory (technically) quotes as 'the embodiment of the downsides of maturity'.**

 **Screw maturity, I want games. Why can't people see gritty and edgy games does not translate to good games, like...that edgy Bomberman Zero? Remember that? It was bad. It was reaaaally bad. Not saying gritty and edgy games can't be done well, many are REALLY well but don't reboot EVERYTHING to edginess. Buy a Wii U or Nintendo Switch if you can, it has great games and shouldn't be seen as 'for kids' because it's Nintendo, which what I'm saying.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Robin: Be careful, Bruce. This monster is the most powerful foe you ever faced.

Batman: What? It's a pink marshmallow.

Robin: This marshmallow has killed gods, destroy entire races, blew up a PLANET! It survived getting blown up by a planet! More than once!

Batman: Anything else?

Robin: That's not all, he can eat you, digest you, then poop you out as a star and somehow steal one of you rap abilities, cowl and cape also.

Batman: The cowl, it can copy that?

Robin: Yes.

Batman: Nobody steals my cowl. Robin, close this call, you don't want to head this.

Robin: Right, sir!

*ends call*

* * *

 **Nobody, I mean nobody touches the cowl of the Bat.**

 **I MEAAAAAN NOOOBODY.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	28. King Dedede

King Dedede

* * *

 **For some reason, I nearly forgot this guy was in the roster. Now I found out how strong he was and used him more just to spite my brat of a cousin by using up special and smashing him to the ground.**

 **He is painful to counterattack.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Oracle: Oh shoot, a royal dignitary.

Batman: He claims to be royalty, there isn't anything else.

Oracle: But his people would be outraged by his defeat, Bruce. Maybe you should sit this one out, so this won't cause an interdimensional incident or something.

Batman: I beat politicians up before.

Oracle: But this is a king, not a mayor who builds giants prisons-

Robin: CAN YOU JUST STOP TALKING ABOUT POLITICS AND SMASH ALREADY?!

Batman: Like Robin said.

Oracle: Don't blame me if you're wanted international criminals.

*ends call*

* * *

 **Wow, dem politics though.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	29. Meta Knight

Meta Knight

* * *

 **Ah, Meta Knight. You will be a goddamn enigma to this entire thing. The only backstory we get is that he looks like an emo Kirby, he has a sword and wings, fights a Galacta Knight. Nothing else but he got OP, goodness the AIDS I got when I saw the power he held in Brawl.**

 **Now he can't glide, shit.**

 **Also Kirby has been literally and official said to have infinite power.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Alfred: Well this is a certainly odd fighter.

Batman: Odd? It's a blue ball with a mask and sword, I think ran out of things to surprise me.

Alfred: This fighter was top tier ranked in the last Smash, you see. In his damage output was ridiculous.

Batman: I'm being sent the numbers, it's huge, why is he downgraded if he had so much power?

Alfred: I do believe for balancing reasons.

Batman: Balancing? In this fight, balancing won't save you.

Alfred: So, you will trip, like the last game also?

Batman: You did not just make that joke. It's as bad as the bathtub joke.

Alfred: The one where I drew a bath?

Batman: Don't bring that up again, please.

Alfred: Of course.

*ends call*

* * *

 **Was busy, whoops.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	30. Fox

Fox

* * *

 **Fox only. No items. Final Destination only.**

 **Welp, I'm dead. I suck without at least one item.**

 **I am now addicted to SilvaGunner, why Snow Halation, why?!**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*start call*

Batman: A pilot? Animals never should drive.

Oracle: Bats especially.

Batman: What was that?

Oracle: Nothing. Fox has a reflector that surrounds him, and a blaster that can hit you and you wouldn't even notice, so he'll damage you and you wouldn't even notice how he did it.

Batman: I have to keep track of my health while keeping track of him, got it. How does he even pilot, all that...fur in the cockpit.

Oracle: I'm pretty sure animal evolution in space made shedding obsolete.

Batman: Perhaps I should take his spaceship and reverse engineer it for a Batwing suited for space travel.

Oracle: I don't think that's a good idea, there isn't any enemy in space yet.

Batman: I will construct a space station to house vigilantes like me as a headquarters, I promise you that.

Oracle: Whatever.

*ends call*

* * *

 **IT'S THE NUTSHACK.**

 **IT'S THE NUTSHACK.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	31. Falco

Falco

* * *

 **There is proof Kirby has infinite power, found it one KnowYourMeme, a screenshot of a game. Don't judge me, it's true.**

 **Dunno what's the point of Falco kicking the reflector, it's useful if you use it normally.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*start call*

Alfred: A blue bird, now I see...

Batman: It's not time for obscure references, tell me the abilities of this bird.

Alfred: Master Falco is the highest jumper out of all your opponents, his jump height is quite admiral.

Batman: He can just fly? Can't he?

Alfred: I believe not, sir.

Batman: So, he can't flail his arms and fly away?

Alfred: No sir.

Batman: Is he edible?

Alfred: My goodness, sir! Grilled or roasted?

Batman: That was a joke.

Alfred: Oh yes, a joke...

Batman: But prepare the grill just in case.

Alfred: If you confiscate it, the blaster he carries will be a great lighter.

Batman: I can taste it already...

*ends call*

* * *

 **Time to eat some bird!**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	32. Pikachu

Pikachu

* * *

 **Who's that Pokémon?**

 **It was me, Dio!**

 **MWAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA?**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: Is this Electrocutioner's pet? It's an electric mouse.

Robin: Pikachu...the bane of my existence.

Batman: Why is it the bane of your existence?

Robin: People fawn over this rat! He could fry their brains, I'm just a sidekick, nobody pays attention to the sidekick!

Batman: People pay attention, most of the time to mock you but still, they lay attention?

Robin: Then why don't you give me a car? Chicks dig the car.

Batman: Just tell me about Pikachu.

Robin: He's electric, summons lightning, do the math. When do I get the car?

Batman: Do you want me to give you that spare Batmobile I have in emergencies and just give it to you?

Robin: Oh yeah.

Batman: Sorry Time, but it's for EMERGENCIES only.

Robin: You have a jet!

Batman: You don't, go back to beating the Penguin, Pikachu awaits.

Robin: You did not just say that.

Batman: Oh yes I did.

*ends call*

* * *

 **Dear goodness, since I'm writing another fic at the same time, my schedule is tight. I'm poor currently, so I can't play Sun or Moon.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	33. Charizard

Charizard

* * *

 **I believe Mega Charizard Y is more powerful than Mega Charizard X, because of Drought and Solar Beam instantly kills everyone. It is painful to my opponents.**

 **I mean, reaaaallly painful.**

 **Give me Pokémon, Santa. Pleeeeaaaaase.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Professor Oak: Hello, are you my grandson?

Batman: Who are you, how did you get into this call?

Professor Oak: I don't know, I had an Magneton fix my broken PC. It's a test if Pokémon with the proper training can repair electronics.

Batman: Well, get out of this call. I'm too busy.

Professor Oak: Oh! Is that the sound of a Charizard nearby? I'm a Pokémon professor, so I'll give you some insight.

Batman: That is actually helpful. Inform me.

Professor Oak: Well, Charizard has Flamethrower, a signature move. He breathes fire at you and it is painful for everyone, avoid that. Despite looking heavy, he can fly and will catch you off guard if given the chance.

Batman: Can you tell me more.

Professor Oak: Charizard can also-no. NO!

Batman: What's going on?

Professor Oak: A Muk broke into the lab! It's all over me, have to end the call, sorry Zubatman!

Batman: Zubatman?

*ends call*

* * *

 **NEED POOOOOKÉMON! I want a giant sandbox Pokémon game made by Monolith Soft, the guys who made the Xenoblade games.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	34. Lucario

Lucario

* * *

 **I remember back then I didn't give a crap about stats in Pokémon, things were simpler back then for me. Beating the hell out out of everyone with Close Combat was amazing.**

 **Crap, now I know that move will get me killed.**

 **My pride and joy for a Pokémon is my Garchomp, which is so...so beautiful.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Alfred: Ah, aura!

Batman: Aura?

Alfred: Aura is a concept that all life has some sort of energy surrounding them. Lucario is a Pokémon that uses that energy into their attacks.

Batman: So how does Lucario puts his aura into his attacks?

Alfred: If Lucario gets more damaged, the more powerful attacks become. Quite dangerous because if you damage him enough, his attacks will become twice as powerful.

Batman: Sounds dangerous, I have to finish this...thing quickly?

Alfred: Thing?

Batman: I can't classify Pokémon, Alfred. They should make an app for me to find them on the go.

Alfred: Uh...

Batman: What?

*ends call*

* * *

 **The character I want most in Smash is someone named Yoshikage Kira. If you know who he is, you'll be like "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"**

 **Better than Goku and Shrek.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	35. Jigglypuff

Jigglypuff

* * *

 **I never thought making your own shield explode causes you to die. I know it happens in Halo but Jigglypuff is taking it on a whole new level of getting screwed once your shield is gone.**

 **Took my awhile to learn Jigglypuff's down special, how am I supposed to know it wasn't a weird counter? It's very strong but Jigglypuff is so weak.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Robin: BRUCE, I AM BUSY FIGHTING BANE HERE! BAD TIME FOR A CALL!

Batman: Tim, tell me about this fighter-

Robin: You do not understand! He has a car! Oh my-

Bane: I'll crush you, little bird!

Batman: Should I just end the call or...

Robin: No! Don't end it, if you want info, I'll talk! Jigglypuff is-oh jeez, that car nearly hit me!

Batman: Is what?

Robin: Jigglypuff has the power to make you sleep for a short time! Also if it sleeps, don't hit it-OH NO! BANE, DON'T THROW THAT!

Bane: Not a chance! Gah!

Robin: Ah!

Batman: Is this a bad time-?

Robin: Oh my goodness! You want to jump in here and save the day like always, you don't think I want to be the hero for the day? Everyone cheers, "Robin, thank you for saving us from a GIANT MONSTER THAT SOMEHOW COMES BACK EVERY OTHER MONTH!"

Batman: Maybe you should calm down-

Robin: I am sick of you telling me to calm down! I am perfectly capable to AGH!

Bane: The bird is broken!

Batman: Tim! Speak to me!

Robin: I'm alright, my spine isn't broken but it hurts.

Batman: I'll just not distract you anymore...

Robin: Oh no, he's coming again-

*ends call*

* * *

 **That sounded painful. Like...really painful!**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	36. Greninja

Greninja

* * *

 **Surprised he got in Smash but now I'm accustomed. Wonder if he gets at least the Ash-Greninja alternate costume for the next Smash.**

 **I saw Smash Infinite, a mod that somehow surpassed Project M in sheer ridiculousness. You can play as those freaking Minions, Dio Brando, a Battle Toad, John Cena. Look it up on YouTube, holy crap.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Oracle: Now this is a Pokémon the League of Shadows must have trained.

Batman: Is that a scarf? Detective Mode says it isn't one.

Oracle: That's a tongue, Greninja wraps it around itself.

Batman: Ugh.

Oracle: Yeah, ugh indeeed.

Batman: I know it's amphibious in nature but what if it fell on dirt? The tongue would taste it.

Oracle: Don't dwell on it. Greninja is a master of stealth, being quick, can stick onto walls, and even uses a substitute as a counter.

Batman: It's odd? What if Greninja went into a pile of manure or fell in a sewage pipe? Would it taste the filth?

Oracle: Bruce-

Batman: Can it tastes smell? Does saliva drip down? Has the tongue have some sort of muscle tissue on it? Perhaps I'll drag Greninja back to the Batcave and do some dissecting.

Oracle: Bruce, this isn't a frog you had to cut open in elementary. This is a ninja, a Greninja, don't lose your focus.

Batman: What are you my trainer? Oracle sends out Zubatman!

Oracle: I like the sound of that.

Batman: No you don't.

*ends call*

* * *

 **NIIIIINJAAAAAA!**

 **Wonder if another Pokémon character would show up in the next Smash. Check Smash Infinite, also tutorial on how to download the mod on YouTube. Has a new HUD also, might not be as better programmed as Project M but the sheer content gave me a heart attack.**

 **STAY TUNED?**


	37. ROB

R.O.B

* * *

 **His existence nearly destroyed the video game universe. Holy crap. In Smash Infinite, you can play as Donald Dickhead and freaking Angry Birds. You can play as Sans suckers!**

 **It is both amazing and dumb.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Alfred: A robot? Did Nr. Nygma somehow make one? It isn't green however.

Batman: I remember having one of these. A R.O.B.

Alfred: You did?

Batman: It was a controller you bought for me for the NES. It worked on two games only, Gyromite and Stack-Up.

Alfred: Ah yes, when you were still a child. This novelty controller also somehow nearly caused the end of the world itself.

Batman: Hs race was under threat of Tabuu, don't blame for him for this.

Alfred: Anyhow, there is a beeper on top of his head, of it glows, his laser is ready to strike at full power.

Batman: Thank you, Alfred. Also brush off the old NES, I might need to bursh my skills in Gyromite again,

Alfred: Of course, if you have the time.

Batman: I never have the time.

Alfred: Exactly the point, sir.

*ends call*

* * *

 **Well, Bruce has a childhood, didn't he? Don't judge me on canonical info, I swear.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	38. Ness

Ness

* * *

 **I found his PK Fire to be very OP. Like...oh my goodness. If two players play as Ness and spam PK Fire and both stay at the side, it can rack up so much damage it's not even funny. Happened me online, my god.**

 **NANANANANANANANANABATMAN!**

 **STORY IS NOW.**

* * *

*starts call*

Robin: A psychic! Look, Bruce...psychics aren't on your jurisdiction, sit this one out.

Batman: Why, Tim? I could easily take this kid on.

Robin: He went up against Giygas! A monstrous atrocity that destroyed the future! If he was able to survive him, what makes you sure you can survive Ness?!

Batman: Does he have Batarangs?

Robin: No.

Batman: Does he have a Batclaw?

Robin: No.

Batman: Does he have a Batmobile?

Robin: No.

Batman: Then this is easy for me. Now, excuse me Tim, I've got a kid to teach manners to.

Robin: Be careful, what he can dish out is painful!

Batman: The name whatever he has Bat-something because he wouldn't beat me.

*ends call*

* * *

 **I'm so tired, oh gawd. Wait for the next DiU of JoJo. Holy crap.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	39. Captain Falcon

Captain Falcon

* * *

 **FALCON PAWNCH! FALCON KIIIICK!**

 **I main Captain Falcon so hard. It's so satisfying to punch people. Falcon Kick is a great starting attack just to get everyone off guard.**

 **STORY IS NOW.**

* * *

*starts call*

Oracle: I wanna say it.

Batman: Don't you dare.

Oracle: FALCON PUNCH!

Batman: You know what, I'm getting rid of this call.

Oracle: C'mon Bruce, don't be like that-

*ends call*

* * *

 **Only reaction I can be sure Bruce would do.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	40. Villager

Villager

* * *

 **The serial killer. You can play catch if you just keep catching Thoron while friendly fire is on. He has an axe, nobody runs away from the axe, NOOOOOBODY.**

 **Painful attack, the tree.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Alfred: Master Bruce! Be careful of this person!

Batman: Alfred? You are panicking, that is never a good sign.

Alfred: I have met the Villager before, in the fields of war.

Batman: Really? You have met this fighter?

Alfred: Yes, the Villager fought beside me, on raids against bandits of the Middle East. The Villager was a monster that terrified me.

Batman: You must be joking.

Alfred: I am afraid not, sir. The Villager is one of those people who watched the world burn. Last time I heard of the Villager was when the Villager was pronounced mayor of a town.

Batman: Mayor?

Alfred: Apparently so, you wish to look into it. I have many friends from the military who I wish to investigate also.

Batman: I'll be careful, thanks for the tip.

Alfred: Like Reggie...yes...

*ends call*

* * *

 **I can actually see Nintendo knowing the Villager's sadism is a meme and rolled with it.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	41. Olimar

Olimar

* * *

 **I dunno how to use Olimar. At all, I suck as him. I keep throwing his Pikmin around but lose them. It's ridiculous, at least his up special ain't a whip, that was haaaaaard to use.**

 **Oh my goodness, he's top tier but I can't freaking use him!**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Robin: Watch out, Olimar's an alien.

Batman: An alien?

Robin: From whatever planet Olimar comes from, oxygen is toxic and fatal to their race.

Batman: What kind of species is allergic to oxygen? Tell me about those other aliens behind him, Tim.

Robin: Those are Pikmin, their vegetation in nature. They work in colonies and seem to believe Olimar is their leader.

Batman: I can imagine each one is dangerous. If we cook a Pikmin, will we gain the abilities they possess?

Robin: Pretty sure eating them doesn't work like that.

Batman: But it is something I am willing to find out.

Robin: Oh my goodness, no.

Batman: Don't worry, I'll save you some, Tim.

Robin: Bruce, no.

*ends call*

* * *

 **I am poor right now. Can't play my Nintendo games. Why economy.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	42. Wii Fit Trainer

Wii Fit Trainer

* * *

 **My goodness, I am bad using the Wii Fit Trainer. TIME TO HEAL WITH DA SUUUUUUN! I'm bad at using that.**

 **Also the down move is ridiculous, what the heck.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Oracle: I actually wonder how you exercise, Bruce.

Batman: Hmm?

Oracle: I know you trained with the League of Assassins but what are your daily exercises? Like, push-ups, sit-ups? Anything?

Batman: I have training programs implanted in the Batcomputer, look those ups.

Oracle: But what if some media giants want to interview you? Gotta have an excuse.

Batman: I'll just do the usual; let Alfred explain it for me.

Oracle: He can't keep doing that forever.

Alfred: Yes, sir. I can't keep doing that forever.

Batman: How did you get into the call?

Alfred: I was cooking tacos of Tuesday when I overheard Miss Barbara say my name, she's right in the neighboring room.

Batman: Why are you in my home?

Oracle: Taco Tuesday.

Batman: I never have a Taco Tuesday.

Alfred: Master Grayson recommended it, a rather exotic delicacy, don't you think?

Batman: Just make sure bring salsa also.

Alfred: Of course.

Oracle: Don't forget the nacho cheese.

Batman: Wasn't this conversation exercise and not about fattening yourselves?

Oracle: Be quiet.

*ends call*

* * *

 **My brain hurts. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	43. Shulk

Shulk

* * *

 **I'M REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLYYYYYYYYYY FEELING IT!**

 **My fingers hurt after writing that, ow.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Alfred: A fellow Englishman!

Batman: Apparently he isn't a British man according to the database. He's a Hom.

Alfred: A Hom? Is that what they call him? Is there some tensions rising in England again due to immigrants?

Batman: No...he lives on a giant.

Alfred: A giant? I knew I should have checked England if it was in trouble.

Batman: He's not an immigrant.

Alfred: He lives on a giant robot! I bet the chap will really feel it if it. Moved.

Batman: It hasn't moved for a millennia.

Alfred: Does he even drink tea?

Batman: Don't ask me. I don't know.

Alfred: I shall invite him over for Taco Tuesday!

Batman: We're still at that again.

Alfred: Oh yes, sir.

*ends call*

* * *

 **Taco Tuesday.**

 **Yay.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	44. Dr Mario

Dr. Mario

* * *

 **Dr. Mario wins by overdosing people. Hooray for misused legal drugs. Who's more deader?**

 **Inserted JonTron quote here.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: That's Mario.

Robin: No, that's Dr. Mario.

Batman: A doctor? Why's he fighting?

Robin: Nobody knows. He throws pills at you, lots of them.

Batman: I can just get some from the pharmacy, you know?

Robin: You take medication?

Batman: I'm old, I need some, especially pain killers.

Robin: After a night of tossing thugs into dumpsters, Bruce Wayne takes medicine in the drawer.

Batman: Stop.

Robin: Afterward, he learns the pill was a temporal bomb that once eaten, make him reverse time and explode.

Batman: Where is this going?

Robin: Then, he uses his Batarang to activate the bomb because he knows pills smell like-

Batman: You know what, I'll stop your monologuing. It's too painful.

Robin: Will Robin and Batman save the day? Stay tuned!

*ends call*

* * *

 **Huh, I did a 60s Batman show reference. Didn't even notice till the end.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	45. Dark Pit

Dark Pit

* * *

 **OW, THE EDGE.**

 **The most edgy character comes to Smash! His edge has cut trees down, children down, even gods down.**

 **NO GOD NO GRAVES.**

 **STORY IS NOOOOOW.**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: A darker Pit?

Oracle: Dark Pit, yes. We call him Pittoo.

Batman: Is that his villain nickname? I don't understand this.

Oracle: No, it's Pit-Two-

Batman: I know the concept of nicknames, just why is there a Dark Pit?

Oracle: Well, he's a manifestations of everything opposite of Pit from Pandora's mirror-

Batman: Yes, a clone that somehow mirrors the protagonist. I've fought Catman and Prometheus before.

Oracle: Just watch out, he's more suited for single battles than anything.

Batman: Got it, what's next? A Batwoman?

*ends call*

* * *

 **OW THE EDGE.**

 **STAY TUNED.**


	46. Lucina

Lucina

* * *

 **Flatter chest than wood. Enough said.**

 **I never knew Stanford Pines was the insane teacher from Whiplash. Probably threw a chair at someone during their funeral.**

 **Sounds amazing.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: Is this Marth?

Alfred: No sir. It is-

Batman: Martha?

Alfred: Even though I am old, even I know that was a terrible pun.

Batman: Right, who is this person?

Alfred: This is Princess Lucina of Ylisse and is a remarkable swordswoman.

Batman: So she's Marth?

Alfred: Their moves are extremely similar, yes. However her damage output is entirely consistent throughout rather than the most damage by the tip like Prince Marth.

Batman: So I should just keep away from her.

Alfred: Of course, sir.

Batman: Don't worry, I'll beat Martha over here and toss her off the stage.

Alfred: Stop mentioning your mother, Master Bruce.

*ends call*

* * *

 **MAAAAAARTHAAAAAAAA.**

 **That was a dumb resolution.**

 **STAY TUNED.**


	47. Pac-Man

Pac-Man

* * *

 **The look on my face when he was announced is incredible.**

 **Also Pac-Man and the Ghostly Adventures stink, oh my god I never cringed in a video game adaption on television so much next to the DIC Nintendo shows.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: It's Pac-Man! That slice-removed pizza.

Robin: Are there any power pellets nearby? The dark and giant ones specifically.

Batman: No.

Robin: Well, you're good, goodbye. I'm busy helping Barbara cook.

Batman: Tim, what are you-

*ends call*

* * *

 **This is my reaction when I first saw Pac-Man, this was my reaction.**

 **The Smash Ball is an overpowered power pellet.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	48. Mega Man

Mega Man

* * *

 **SUPER FIGHTING ROBOT.**

 **HE IS A MOTHERFREAKING ROBOT WHO SHOOT LAAAAAAZAAAAARS FROM THE SKY.**

 **I'm done now.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: It's a ranged fighter, and...a robot?

Oracle: That's Mega Man, he was created by Dr. Light along with a bunch of other robots but Dr. Wily reprogrammed all the robots to do evil deeds for him so Dr. Light made Mega Man a battle robot with the power to take the powers of the Robot Masters so save the world!

Batman: That sounded rehearsed.

Oracle: I'm a big fan. Anyhow Mega Man has a plethora of weaponry he can use like a shield made of leaves, a flaming sword, and saw he can throw at you. I'd better be careful around him.

Batman: So he's a ranged fighter, how am I supposed to beat him.

Oracle: Don't give him any chances, Bruce. Just keep beating him up u til you win.

Batman: That doesn't sound like a good strategy, Barbara.

Oracle: Just don't damage the Mega Buster, okay? I want that.

*ends call*

* * *

 **I hope he busts out his Mega Buster.**

 **implying**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	49. Sonic

Sonic

* * *

 **Anybody watched Sonic Underground. It was like a freaking fanfiction brought to life. Predicted all the messed up fanart of Sonic later.**

 **Ugh.**

 **Sorry for delays. Holidays. It rhymes.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: Is this a dyed raccoon, Alfred?

Alfred: No, that is Sonic, the fastest thing alive, according to what the song says.

Batman: I thought he wore a scarf, had long legs also.

Alfred: We are not discussing that.

Batman: But-

Alfred: No, sir. We are never discussing that, ever.

Batman: ...

Alfred: ...

Batman: ...

Alfred: Never-

Batman: Okay.

*ends call*

* * *

 **The only good thing from Sonic Boom is the cartoon and the new character I forgot her name was.**

 **Also did anybody play Sonic Rush, both on the DS. They are gooood.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	50. Mewtwo

Mewtwo

* * *

 **We're in the DLC zone. Be careful, we just pay with money.**

 **Sorry if I sucked last chapter. Was another place, rushed the chapter but I'm too lazy to rewrite it.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: What is this creature?

Robin: That's Mewtwo, a genetic clone of Mew created by Team Rocket.

Batman: So that's where the 'Two' comes from.

Robin: I heard Mewtwo was pathetic in the last Smash it was in but was powered up in this Smash.

Batman: Improvement, I like it.

Robin: Also he's DLC.

Batman: DLC? We had to pay for him to be here.

Robin: Yup, we did...you're rich enough.

Batman: Doesn't mean I'll pay for this.

Robin: Hey, I'm having money problems already. You're a billionaire, Bruce. Suck it up.

Batman: Tim, just get back to stopping muggers or something.

Robin: Okay, okay, I will.

Criminal: No wait, don't-WAAAAAAAAA-

*ends call*

* * *

 **I just wanna play Pokémon already right now.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	51. Lucas

Lucas

* * *

 **ACT 3 FREEEEEEZE!**

 **I got nothing.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Oracle: Oh, it's Lucas. Wonder where he went.

Batman: Lucas?

Oracle: He's like Ness, a lot more tragic and had a snake for a rope.

Batman: A snake?

Oracle: Don't remember how he got it but he can grab you with it like the Batclaw. You know he also has a freezing attack.

Batman: Like...the Freeze Blast? Is this boy a Ness version of me?

Oracle: Well you got the tragedy, the freezing, the grapples. Nothing else.

Batman: Maybe I should make him the next Robin, he has all the tools, why not?

Robin: Hey!

Oracle: Don't worry Tim, we can give you another name.

Robin: What? Red Robin? Don't replace me and make me live with Dick!

Batman: Red Robin's not a bad name.

Robin: NO! DON'T REPLACE ME!

Oracle: Okay, we're ending the call for your sake, see you Red Robin.

Robin: DON'T YOU DARE, BARB-

*ends call*

* * *

 **Hmm. Nobody reference the Red Robin? I like their food.**

 **RED ROBIN, YUM.**

 **STAY TUNED! YUM!**


	52. Roy

Roy

* * *

 **ROY GREW UP HOT IN A LITERAL AND HANDSOME WAY FOR NEXT SMASH!**

 **Hope you like this children, Roy has a Blazing Sword. Sounds like a very obvious reference. Byoutiful.**

 **STORY IS NOW**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: Is this one of Bowser's children?

Alfred: Heavens no, sir! That is royalty you are talking to-well, both Roys are royalty actually.

Batman: His sword is on fire...I have a suit for cold temperatures but not for flaming swords.

Alfred: Do not worry, sir. He has an extremely similar moveset to Prince Marth, so I know you shall do fine.

Batman: I just realize that we have too much royalty in this Smash. Are we going into political territory a tad but too much?

Alfred: Politics, politics. Says the man who tried to run for mayor.

Batman: I swore I'd never try to do politics again afterward.

Alfred: Yes, seeing how you were put into a city of deranged criminals makes people pursue a different career choice.

Batman: If I was mayor, I wouldn't need to pay for a clone of Marth.

Alfred: Okay, now you're getting too political, sir.

*ends call*

* * *

 **Wonder if this is what out ancestors died for, lots of political arguments online.**

 **Of my goodness, school is locking me harder than a zipper caught in my di-**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	53. Ryu

Ryu

* * *

 **I am not good a Street Fighter. Not saying it's a bad game, it far from it but I REALLY suck! I'm stuck at using Hadoken, jeez! I'll just be with Smash until then.**

 **Now I'm playing Dragon Age, still getting used to it but I really love it right now.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: Ryu?

Robin: Yeah, this guy's a legend in combat! Taking on people like Akuma and M. Bison!

Batman: Who are those?

Robin: People you should take down one day. Ryu is unique because he utilizes the combo system from his home series in Smash.

Batman: So he can do that Hadoken thing I hears about?

Robin: Exactly!

Batman: Then I should throw more Batarangs.

Robin: Bruce, Batarangs won't help against a seasoned fighter like him-

Batman: Batarangs never failed me once, won't fail me this time.

Robin: Ugh.

*ends call*

* * *

 **I'm not very knowledgeable about Street Fighter besides the characters. Don't have that great of a joke besides this.**

 **Ugh.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	54. Cloud

Cloud

* * *

 **I haven't play FF7 but if I get a PS4, I'll play the HD remake...at GoTY edition because they said it may be episodic so I don't know...want a game in its completed form before buying it.**

 **I'm also too poor right now.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Oracle: Bruce! It's Cloud, don't hurt his face.

Batman: Cloud? He's not a cloud.

Oralce: Very funny, he fought with AVALANCHE and went toe-to-tow against Sephiroth! Is that so cool?

Batman: Are you a fangirl?

Oracle: Oh very much, Bruce. Look at that feminine face, that spiky hair...that sword.

Batman: That is a large sword , larger than his body even. How can he carry it?

Oracle: No idea but it's cool! My favorite part about Cloud is that he dressed up as a very pretty girl and got away with it.

Batman: Are you serious? You aren't, aren't you?

Oracle: It may not look like it but I'm nodding enthusiastically.

Batman: Goodbye Barbara.

*ends call*

* * *

 **Sorry but I don't have the DLC...or any Final Fantasy game besides Kingdom Hearts.**

 **I suck.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	55. Corrin

Corrin

* * *

 **I played Fire Emblem Fates...the entirety. Goodness it drained my money. While I was 'eh' to the story, I found myself replaying the game more than once since the gameplay was cool. But I like Awakening's character better even though I like many other character...**

 **I ran out of money after.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: This person...is a dragon also? And I thought bats were tacky...

Alfred: That is Corrin, Mster Bruce. Adopted child of King Garon of Nohr, but in actuality child of Queen Mikoto of Hoshido! A tale of treachery, friendship, and hope for the future!

Batman: That last sentence is the description of Awakening's story more than Fates.

Alfred: You are knowledgeable about Fates?

Batman: With all the politicians in this Smash, might as well.

Alfred: Well, Corrin wields the Yato, a blade like every other Fire Emblem character except it is a chainsaw also!

Batman: That makes a difference because...?

Alfred: The arm also turns into a lance...

Batman: We must put him in Arkham. No hand should extend for that amount of length.

Alfred: Aye aye, sir...

*ends call*

* * *

 **Still no DLC for me...yet...**

 **Two more chapters to go. The Mii one will be clustered together in one.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	56. Bayonetta

Bayonetta

* * *

 **Oh MAAAAAAAH!**

 **My balls dropped when I first saw this. Hope they get another Bayonetta, I know the first and second one sold poorly but even though I haven't played any, but MWAH!**

 **My mouth hurts.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Robin: Oh goodness. Bruce, be careful and just go crazy.

Batman: Why?

Robin: I can't say any weaknesses! Bayonetta HAS NO WEAKNESS! Just hit her hard enough and eventually she might give in.

Batman: No tactics?

Robin: Look, Bayonetta is extremely fast and powerful, one chance of vulnerability might end you, but Bayonetta is a glass cannon. Just like in her games.

Batman: I never played them.

Robin: I know. *sigh*

Batman: You wished more people to played Bayonetta.

Robin: They're good games! People need to appreciate obscure games even more!

Batman: I'll just your advice now, bye Tim.

Robin: Also everything by Monolith Soft also because they make pretty good games also!

*ends call*

* * *

 **Huh. I never played Bayonetta myself. I wish they release both games in the Nintendo Switch as one. I also can't afford the Switch which is sad, at least Breath of the Wild is going to the Wii U also.**

 **Also did anyone remember Enchanted the Disney movie? That's how Mario shows up in the exact same name way.**

 **STAY TUNED!**


	57. Mii

Mii

* * *

 **This is the last episode here. Been a fun ride but all rides end eventually.**

 **Vroom, vroom. Bye.**

 **STORY IS NOW!**

* * *

*starts call*

Batman: What is that? No really, Barbara. What is that?

Oracle: That's a Mii. It can be a Brawler, a Gunner, or a Swordfighter.

Batman: Anything about them?

Oracle: The Brawler is on a physical side. It's strong on the physical and up-close type.

Batman: Like many criminals who run around Gotham,

Oracle: The Gunner shoots things, just make sure nothing hits you. Basic as that.

Batman: I wish I could use stealth in this Smash.

Oracle: The Swordfighter mixes both. Uses both ranged and physical attacks but is slightly weaker. Like Deathstroke.

Batman: Thank you, you can leave.

Oracle: Um...that's it?

Batmam: Hmm?

Oralce: No joke, nothing?

Batman: Nothing.

Oracle: ...

Batman: ...

Oracle: ...

Batman: I'm...going to end the call.

Oracle: O-Okay, I'll just leave. There's cookies.

Batman: Save me some.

*ends call*

* * *

 **Done. Finally, it was a ride. My fingers hurts.**

 **I am FREEEEEEEE!**

 ***ENDS CALL***


End file.
